Making him whole Read online

  Making him whole

  By: Sage S. Wolf

  Copyright © 2020, Sage S. Wolf

  Copyright © 2020 Sage S. Wolf

  All rights reserved

  The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

  No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher.

  Cover design by: Printok

  Edited by: James 'the muthafkin dragon shifter' Tombe

  ~This book is dedicated to anyone whose ever felt stuck. Stay strong! Fate has a funny way of giving you an exit when you least expect it.~

  Contents

  Making him whole

  Copyright

  Dedication

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Chapter Forty

  Chapter Forty-One

  Chapter Forty-Two

  Books By This Author

  Chapter One

  July 21st, 2020

  Darik

  “What do you mean you aren’t ready yet? I thought we’d agreed on this plan before we got married.” I was trying my best not to yell at my beautiful wife but her constant excuses as to why we shouldn’t start having children were getting old.

  Don’t get me wrong, I would love her just as much if she couldn’t carry children. That wasn’t the problem here. The problem was that we’d agreed to wait at least five years after we were married to start discussing growing our family. Our seventh wedding anniversary was next week, and that discussion hadn’t happened yet.

  Not for my lack of trying. My amazing, beautiful, stubborn wife would either manage to find a way to excuse herself from the conversation or we would end up like this, fighting over a child I thought we both wanted. I would settle for one. Just one and then my desire to be a father would be fulfilled.

  According to Cecilia, she wasn’t ready. At thirty-six, I felt like our time was running out for her to do this naturally. Call me selfish, but I wanted to watch my wife’s body change and grow as our child grew. I wanted to hold her hair when morning sickness hit her and make the middle-of-the-night runs to the store for stuff she was craving. I wanted it all.

  Cecilia knew that.

  “I know we did, and I wanted kids back then, but people change, Darik. I’m not the same woman I was all those years ago. I like the way our life is now without children. I don’t want to share you with anyone yet,” Cecilia stepped closer and ran her hand over my bare chest, her touch sending a direct signal to my dick and I started to harden. Even after all these years, our spark hadn’t died. “Tell me you wouldn’t be frustrated if a little version of you came in right now and interrupted what I’m about to do to you.” She dropped to her knees and nipped my stomach.

  “That’s not fair,” I groaned, grabbing a fistful of her hair and looking down at her. “And I might be frustrated but being a parent means making sacrifices for your kid. I’d rather have a son or daughter running in and jumping on our bed than a blowjob.” Hurt flashed in Ceci’s eyes and I knew I’d fucked up.

  She pulled her hair free of my grasp and stood. “I see,” Then she turned and headed out of the room. “I guess I’ll see you after work then.”

  “Ceci!” I called after her, knowing better than to chase her when she was hurt and angry. My wife might only be 5’3” with a small delicate frame, but she could pack a lot of hurtful things to say in that little body.

  Sighing, I finished getting dressed for work. I poked my head in the office and told Cecilia I loved her before heading out the door. She ignored me which was fine. I knew she loved me even when she was mad.

  We lived in the decent-sized town of Waynesboro, CA.

  My grandfather had left me just short of a million dollars when he passed away a little over a decade ago. I’d used some of that to pay off my student loans and then once I got my physical therapy license, I bought a building near the middle of town and opened up my own practice.

  We catered to mostly older people and I took on clients for free from time to time when the hospital referred them to me. I’d even worked with a few children over the years.

  I liked helping when I could.

  My employees were never assigned my free cases, though a few of them had offered. I always took the pay cut myself, since I didn’t really need the money.

  Bishop’s PT Center was highly talked about by our clients and people were traveling from miles away just to be helped by us. I was fortunate to have an amazing team of physical therapists working for me. I couldn’t have earned a good reputation without them.

  Parking my Suburban in my spot around the back of the building, I got out and went in through the back entrance. My first client of the day was already waiting for me.

  “Good morning, Mr. Whitaker. How’s our shoulder this morning?” I asked.

  He looked up from the magazine he was browsing and smiled. “Feeling pretty good, Mr. Bishop. I think this might be the last session I’ll need to get my doctor to clear me to go fishing again. I miss the catch.”

  The poor guy had torn a tendon in his shoulder while on a fishing trip with his grandkids a few months ago. His shoulder had required surgery and rehab to get it back to being close to what it was before.

  I chuckled and drew a line through his name on the sign-in sheet before turning to him. “Shall we get started then?”

  “Yes, sir. Can’t wait to get back out on my boat with my rod.” He stood and followed me to the area where we did his warm-up sessions before we started to do the fun stuff.

  We went through his stretches, then moved on to some light weights to help build up the strength he’d lost during his recovery from surgery. I tried to focus on helping my client and push the fight with Cecilia to the back on my mind.

  It was a losing battle.

  We’d have to have the actual talk about whether we would have a child soon. Without all her excuses. Or maybe she was being honest and didn’t want to share me, I didn’t know. It seemed a rather selfish reason to me. I loved her more than anything, but I knew if we had a child, they would come first. Any children we had would always come first, even before myself.

  I’d told Cecilia that, hadn’t I? I had, and she’d told me she found it sweet and charming that I’d put our kids first.

  I guess people really do change. I guess my wife had decided she always wan
ted to come first in this relationship. The big question was, was I willing to let my dream of being a father go just to try and make my wife happy. I didn’t know and I couldn’t help feeling like my heart was breaking a little at the thought of never experiencing fatherhood.

  I pushed those thoughts to the back of my mind and focused back on Mr. Whitaker. “How’re the grandkids?” I asked, switching out his five-pound weights for eight-pound ones.

  “They’re great,” Mr. Whitaker grunted as he started his reps with the new weights. “They miss grandpa being able to do stuff with them, though. I admit I’ve spoiled them.”

  I smiled. “Isn’t that your job though? Spoil them and then send them back to their parents?”

  “I suppose so, but sometimes it’s a little more complicated than that. You’ll see when your time comes.”

  “Maybe.” I tried not to let him see that I was bothered by his words. “Give me five more on each arm with the ten-pound weights and your torture session is over.”

  Mr. Whitaker chuckled. “I’m gonna miss you, Darik. You should take me up on that offer to bring your wife on our next family camping trip. We can leave the women at the camp and sneak off with the kids to catch some fish.”

  “I’ll think about it.” And I would. It might be good to get my wife in a situation where there were children. Maybe she would warm back up to the idea of having them...

  Chapter Two

  July 21st, 2020

  Tessa

  “Tess, you have thirty seconds to come out of the bathroom or I’m kicking this door down and dragging you out!” My husband yelled, pounding on the bathroom door.

  “I’ll be out in a second, Zack.” I flushed the toilet, watching the evidence of my secret being sucked down as I placed a protective hand over the slight curve of my stomach.

  They say morning sickness goes away after the first trimester. That might be true for the lucky ones but for a girl like me, I was still dealing with it halfway through my fourth month.

  I’d convinced Zack to let me go to the free clinic once a month to get refills on my birth control. He hated children so it wasn’t hard to get him to agree. He’d be furious if he knew I was now going to get checkups for me and our baby.

  The doctor at the clinic told me that my continued sickness could be due to stress or my clear lack of proper nutrition. Zack fed me enough to keep me at the weight he wanted and no one noticed. Now with a baby growing inside of me, it wasn’t enough to keep us both healthy.

  Opening the cabinet, I took out my prenatal vitamin. The doctor had prescribed me one that could pass as a birth control pill if Zack questioned me. I’d been honest when I told her the father didn’t want children and that I didn’t plan on telling him if I didn’t have to.

  I didn’t tell her about the screaming in my face, telling me how worthless I was as a human and how no other man would ever be able to stand to be stuck with me. I didn’t tell her about the bruises on my legs, arms, and back from his belt which he used to punish me when I did something wrong. I couldn’t remember the last time I had done something right in his eyes.

  I knew I needed to get out sooner rather than later. He would notice I was pregnant any day now.

  A loud bang on the bathroom door startled me, and I almost dropped my vitamin.

  “Tessa, get your fucking ass out here and make me breakfast!” Zack yelled again, followed by more bangs on the door.

  “Coming.” I tried to sound less than the exhausted mess I was and popped the vitamin into my mouth before opening the door.

  Zack blocked my way when I tried to go around him, his eyes running over me as a look of disgust overtook his face. “God, you look like shit, Tess. Did you gain weight?”

  I fought the urge to place my hand over my bump. He didn’t even deserve to see our child while it was growing inside me.

  “Nope,” I shook my head and tried to push past him. Big mistake.

  He grabbed my upper arm hard, causing me to cry out. “You’re a fucking liar!” He growled, turning me so he could look at my backside. “Even your ass is getting fatter. I need to feed you less.”

  Fear gripped my heart. I couldn’t afford to eat less. My baby couldn’t grow properly without what little I was allowed to eat now.

  I wasn’t big to begin with before marrying Zack. I’m 5’2” and petite but I’d inherited bigger hips and thighs from my mom. I guess you could say I was bottom-heavy, though I wasn’t heavy. I’d weighed 120 pounds when I met Zack.

  In the first year of marriage, he had me down to 96 pounds from lack of food and exercise. He’d forced me to sit in our house and waste away. I was four and a half months pregnant and I’d gained one whole pound, putting me at a not-so-healthy 97 pounds.

  “I’m not lying, Zack.” I didn’t try to pull my arm away, knowing he’d just squeeze it harder.

  “Looks like we might need to cancel our dinner date. Can’t have you getting fat on me.” Our second wedding anniversary was coming up and he’d sworn he was going to take me to a nice restaurant. “Go put on more clothes.” Zack pulled me from the bathroom and pushed me toward our bedroom. I did my best not to stumble. “Put on something that won’t make me sick looking at you.”

  I nodded and went to our room.

  Opening the closet, I was greeted with a row of long-sleeved shirts and sweater dresses. I’d learned quickly that t-shirts and tank tops were for when I was sure I wouldn’t encounter anyone. If I left the house, even if it was hot as balls outside, I had to wear long sleeves.

  The sweater dresses were for very special occasions like when Zack had colleagues over for dinner or when he dragged me to a random company outing. He was the big boss at one of the nearby tech companies.

  Zack was very careful when he belted me. He never hit my front or face. I guess that was good news for the baby. I didn’t have to worry about being hit in the stomach. He never hit below the knee or above the shoulders. And on those special occasions, he didn’t hit below my hips to ensure no bruises would show in my dress.

  Reaching into the closet, I grabbed a thin cotton long-sleeved shirt and a pair of joggers. My jeans were starting to get a bit snug on my waist, so I saved that discomfort for when I was allowed to venture out.

  I dressed quickly and went to the kitchen.

  Zack was sitting at the kitchen island reading the paper. We weren’t allowed to use the dining room table unless we had guests.

  “How do you want your eggs?” I asked, pulling a pan off the pan rack over the island.

  Zack looked up from the paper and studied me for a moment. “There’s something different about you. You’re sure you didn’t gain weight?” He gave me a playful grin.

  And there he was. The man I fell in love with. I still got brief glimpses of him, before being replaced by the monster I was married to.

  I smiled and grabbed the eggs from the fridge. “I’m sure, babe. Now tell me how you want your eggs. I don’t want you to be late for work.”

  “And that’s why I married you. Always wanting to take care of me.” Zack stood and came closer until he had me backed against the counter. “You know I love you, right?” He leaned down and kissed me gently.

  I shouldn’t have kissed him back. He was cruel and would probably kill me when he found out about the baby. If, I reminded myself. If he found out.

  “I love you too,” I whispered, starting to tremble. Not from attraction which I’m sure was what Zack was thinking caused it, but because I was terrified of this man.

  This man that had promised to love and cherish me until death do us part. The man that made me feel so loved and wanted one minute and then would hurt me physically and emotionally the next.

  “Mmm, maybe I’ll have you for breakfast,” Zack gripped my waist and sat me on the counter. I couldn’t stop myself from crying out as pain shot through my ass. The bruises there were still fresh from the belting I’d taken three days ago.

  “I’m sorry,” I apologized as the man I loved di
sappeared.

  “Fine. Since it physically hurts you to think about being intimate with me, I’ll just pick up breakfast on the way to work.” He pulled me off the counter, and I stumbled a bit before getting myself balanced. “I’ll be working late again so make sure my dinner isn’t cold when I get home.” He gave me a warning look before he walked out the front door.

  I wanted to scream and cry, but that had never gotten me anywhere, so I took a deep breath and made myself the one egg I was allowed to have for breakfast each day. I didn’t dare try to sneak more, not even a slice of toast because my husband would count it all when he got home. Every egg, every bread slice, every slice of cheese. He knew when I cheated on my diet.

  After I’d eaten, I went to the backyard and pulled out the tin that held my escape money. I’d been cutting corners wherever I could on groceries and other expenses Zack gave me money for and saving what was left over. I counted the money. $443.56. That’s how much money I had saved in the last six months.

  That might get me a bus ticket to somewhere far away or maybe far enough to prolong my death and give me time to find my baby a good home away from this nightmare…

  Chapter Three

  July 24th, 2020

  Darik

  “Honey, I’m home!” I called out as I walked through my front door a few days later.

  Cecilia didn’t answer. She was still being stubborn and barely speaking to me. I didn’t understand why she was still mad.

  I moved through the house, checking the kitchen first and then moving to our bedroom and bathroom. I didn’t see her. I knew she was home because her car was in the driveway. I reached our shared office and found her hard at work on her laptop.

  She was a food blogger and traveled all over the state to eat at different restaurants and then return home and write blogs about her experience.

  “What do you want for dinner or did you already eat?” I asked, leaning against the doorway, hoping she might acknowledge my existence.