Making him whole Read online

  Cecilia pushed her glasses up onto her head and turned to look at me. “I have plans with my sister for dinner. You don’t mind eating alone tonight, do you?”

  I sighed. “Ceci, please.” Walking forward, I dropped to my knees beside her. “I can’t stand you pushing me away.” I stared up into her brown eyes, hoping to see forgiveness--hell, I’d take pity if it meant getting past this.

  I saw none of those things.

  Her answering stare was cold. “I’m not pushing you away, Darik. You did that yourself the moment you said you’d pick a theoretical child over me.”

  “Are you serious?” I frowned and stood to put some space between us. This woman was not my wife. This woman was… “You’re intentionally hurting me because I said that?”

  Ceci shrugged, still not showing any emotion but slight frustration. “You did say it, though, and you meant it didn’t you?”

  “Yes, I meant it.” I ran my fingers through my hair. “We talked about this before we even got engaged. It was one of my deciding factors in marrying you. I thought we wanted the same things in this marriage.”

  “Like I said the other day, Darik, people change. I’ve changed.”

  “So, you don’t want kids?” She shook her head. “Not even an adopted one or one by surrogate?” Another shake. “Just ‘no’ to any form of children?” She finally nodded.

  I was pissed.

  I had been patient and tried my damndest to be understanding of her wanting to wait. And if she’d been the same loving wife as three days ago, I might have considered giving in to her and agreeing to no children.

  She wasn’t.

  “I don’t want to have to share you with another human. One you’ve already admitted will come first.”

  Wow. Just wow. “Who are you and what have you done with my sweet, loving wife?”

  Cecilia huffed. “Don’t be silly. I’m right here, Darik, and I don’t ever plan on going away. I still love you even when we’re fighting over things that shouldn’t be an issue.”

  I took another step back, feeling like I’d been punched in the gut. “But this is an issue because I want to be a dad. I’ve always wanted to be a dad and you knew that from the start. You can’t change the play this late in the game and expect me to just be okay with it, Ceci.”

  Cecilia’s phone started ringing and she looked down at where it sat on the desk. “I’m sorry, I have to take this.” She gave me an apologetic look before answering.

  I didn’t stick around to try and figure out who it was. It was either work or her sister. I had no fear of it being anyone else even if my wife had dramatically changed in the last few days.

  Going to the kitchen, I opened the fridge to see what I could whip up for myself for dinner.

  I still had some left-over garlic chicken that I’d made the night before. I could make some pasta and throw together some homemade alfredo sauce, then warm the chicken, cut it into cubes, and make myself chicken with alfredo sauce over some penne pasta.

  My stomach growled at the thought of the finished product.

  I grabbed the ingredients from the fridge and made my food, then sat down at the kitchen island to eat my dinner alone.

  Cecilia passed the kitchen on her way to get ready for her dinner with her sister and I didn’t bother trying to talk to her.

  We both needed some space to think.

  She must have been feeling the same way because she didn’t even tell me bye or that she loved me on the way out the door…

  Chapter Four

  July 28th, 2020

  Tessa

  I looked at myself in the full-length mirror that hung on the back of my bathroom door. My dark brown hair was curled into flowing waves that hung halfway down my back. My makeup made my hazel eyes pop though they were tired and red. They held a lot of fear in them.

  Tonight was the fancy anniversary dinner I had convinced myself wasn’t happening because of my slight weight gain. Then Zack arrived home from work and demanded I wear my nicest sweater dress. The problem? Over the last week, my bump had grown and was impossible to hide in this dress.

  I didn’t have a clue how I was going to explain it away to Zack.

  “We leave in five minutes whether you’re ready or not, Tess. Move your fat ass!” Zack yelled from the living room.

  “You can do this,” I told my reflection. “One more night and then tomorrow we’ll get ourselves to safety.” I rubbed my bump and smiled.

  I already loved my baby more than myself. I would do anything for them. Even if that meant taking the chance and sneaking out to buy a bus ticket to the farthest place away I could afford.

  I took a steadying breath and exited the bathroom, holding my clutch in front of me like it might shield my secret.

  “Good, you’re finally ready. Let’s go before we miss our reservation.” Zack opened the door and waited for me to step outside before stepping out behind me, then he shut and locked the door.

  We walked to his BMW and he opened the passenger door for me. Not out of respect or courtesy, but so he felt in control of my coming and going.

  If I had tried to open the car door myself, he would have dragged me back inside and belted me until he was sure I’d learned my lesson.

  I had only made that mistake once in the last two years.

  “You remember the rules?” he asked as we pulled out of the driveway.

  I nodded. “Don’t make eye contact with anyone but you. Don’t talk to anyone but you. If someone asks me a question, let you answer.” I’d gone over this list so many times and I knew better than to leave any out even if they didn’t apply to the situation. “Don’t speak unless spoken to. Keep my eyes down unless speaking to you. No bathroom breaks.” That one would be hard since my bean was now the size of a mango and growing fast. I had to pee often now. Maybe I wouldn’t have anything to drink.

  “What else?” Zack snapped, reaching over and pinching the side of my thigh hard.

  I bit my lip to stop myself from crying out. “Umm...” Pregnancy brain was a thing and I was terrifyingly drawing a blank on the rest of the rules. “I can’t remember the others right off the top of my head, but I know how to act, Zack. I promise!”

  He pinched my thigh again, this time causing me to let out a whimper. “You better fucking act right or you won’t be leaving the house for the next six months.”

  “I will,” I assured him, hoping to not get pinched again.

  “Good. Just keep your mouth shut for the rest of the night and let me enjoy our anniversary without the sound of your annoying voice.”

  My silence was my agreeance which seemed to please him.

  I fought back the urge to cry. That would’ve only gotten me into more trouble.

  We rode the rest of the way to the restaurant in silence.

  I was a little shocked when we pulled up in front of the fancy Italian restaurant that Zack had proposed to me at. I hadn’t been here in over two years.

  I wasn’t complaining. I’d been craving pasta like crazy the last month. My mouth started to water over the thought of those delicious carbs.

  When the valet opened my door, I stayed in my seat and kept my eyes down. I knew better than to get out or even acknowledge him while I waited for Zack to come around for me. The valet probably thought I was being rude as hell.

  If only he knew the truth about the belting I would’ve gotten for showing him any kind of appreciation for opening my door.

  It was worth having him think less of me.

  Zack took my hand in his and gripped it tight, pulling me out of the car and heading inside. He let them know we had a reservation and we were seated quickly.

  I didn’t take my menu when it was offered to me. I kept my eyes down and my mouth shut like I was expected to while he ordered our food.

  I was getting a salad with light dressing for my meal.

  I sighed internally. I don’t know why I’d thought I would get to eat a decent meal for once and blamed myself for getting m
y hopes up. For getting my bean’s hopes up. Yes, I’d promised my unborn child pasta for dinner tonight. And it was the first and last promise I would ever break to them as long as it was in my control.

  Tomorrow. Tomorrow I’d be free…

  Chapter Five

  July 28th, 2020

  Darik

  Cecilia was finally talking to me again by the time our anniversary came around. We were at my favorite Italian restaurant. I was a sucker for all things pasta.

  We still hadn’t agreed on the kid thing, but we’d been discussing going to marriage counseling to try and work through it together.

  I stared at my beautiful wife across the table. She was talking about her sister and how her two-year-old nephew had found a new use for eggs, like smearing them all over her sister’s carpet.

  I would have laughed but it made me ache for something I couldn’t have yet.

  “So how did she get the egg out?” I asked.

  “Oh, she didn’t,” Cecilia frowned. “They have to have it replaced with hardwood next week.”

  That I did laugh at. “Aren’t you glad our house is already all hardwood?” I regretted the question as soon as it left my mouth and watched as my wife’s eyes narrowed.

  “Darik, we aren’t discussing anything to do with us having kids outside of therapy from now on. You agreed.”

  “I know, I’m sorry. I got caught up in the moment.”

  Cecilia smiled and reached across the table, taking my hand in hers. “It’s okay. I’m trying to be patient with you just like I know you are with me until we can get on the same page again.”

  She said she was trying to be patient with me but at the same time she’d been an emotional rollercoaster the last four days. I wasn’t sure what was going on with her. One minute she was mad and the next she was loving. It was a bit confusing. Hopefully, it was something else our marriage counseling could help me address with her.

  “I appreciate you being patient with me, Ceci.” I brought her hand to my mouth and kissed her knuckles.

  The waiter then came to take our orders.

  I ordered a large plate of spaghetti with extra tomatoes and garlic bread on the side. I was gonna eat myself into a coma tonight. Cecilia ordered shrimp and pasta with garlic sauce. She loved all things garlic and I knew she’d be stealing some of my garlic bread by the end of the night. She always did and I never minded.

  If my wife was happy, I was happy. Mostly.

  Our food arrived and we dug in.

  About halfway through my plate, I felt eyes on me and tried to casually look around to see who it was. I scanned most of the room and then my eyes landed on someone sitting in a dark booth at the back of the restaurant.

  She was small and her hazel eyes were locked not on me, as I’d thought I’d felt, but on my plate of food. There was a plate of what looked like steak with sides on the other side of her table waiting for whoever ordered it to return or show up.

  She only had a small salad in front of her, though. Maybe she was on a diet. She didn’t look like she needed one.

  Movement under the table grabbed my attention. She was absently rubbing her stomach like she had a stomach ache or cramps. That would’ve explained the light meal. Or she was pregnant. The thought hit me square in the chest, sending air whooshing out and I coughed.

  Cecilia gave me a concerned look. “You okay?”

  I nodded. “Yea, honey. I must have eaten those last few bites too fast.”

  I glanced back at my mystery food gazer to see her companion had returned. She now had both hands on the table while looking directly at her plate as he talked.

  Strange.

  Not that I had any room to judge someone else’s relationship.

  “Why don’t we get to-go containers and finish this meal at home?” Cecilia winked at me and then ran her heeled foot up the inside of my leg, stopping at my thigh.

  I stood and threw my napkin on the table dramatically. “Say no more!”

  Cecilia laughed and the sound made me puff my chest up with pride. I’d made my woman laugh like that. “Okay, hot stuff, go get a waiter so we can get out of here. I might have bought new lingerie for tonight.”

  “Fuuck…” I cursed under my breath, making my way toward the nearest waiter.

  I needed to see my wife’s new lingerie…

  Chapter Six

  Tessa

  I was trying everything to avoid getting sick. The vinegar dressing they’d put on my salad was not agreeing with my sensitive stomach.

  When Zack had excused himself to take a phone call, I let my eyes cautiously wander around the plates of the other diners. I was fantasizing about what it would be like to eat a whole meal for once.

  Then my eyes landed on the biggest plate of spaghetti I had ever seen. My mouth started to water, and my nausea faded as I zeroed in on my new fantasy food.

  It was being eaten by an attractive man with broad shoulders and a head of sandy blonde hair. I couldn’t quite make out his eye color from where I was sitting, but I was betting they were blue.

  Zack’s eyes were dark blue and his hair just a shade darker than the man currently eating my fantasy meal.

  I stared back down at the plate of delicious pasta and my stomach growled. “I know, bean. Me too,” I mumbled, sneaking an affectionate rub for my child before Zack came back and required my hands on the table at all times.

  “God, I swear those idiots can’t do anything without me.” Zack’s voice startled me, and I quickly placed my hands back on the table and stared down at my plate.

  He must not have seen me looking elsewhere or I’d have been dragged outside already. He was caught up in whatever was happening at work.

  My nausea came back full force when I looked back down at my salad and took in the vinegar smell again. I couldn’t fight the urge this time. “Gonna be sick,” I said, standing from the table and heading toward the bathroom.

  I didn’t have time to think about how much trouble I would be in for speaking or leaving the table without permission. I was about to throw up…

  I suddenly ran smack into a brick wall of a chest.

  “Whoa, easy,” a deep voice said as hands grabbed hold of my arms and stabilized me.

  I cried out at the pain of the pressure on my bruises before vomiting the tiny bit of salad and water I had in my stomach all over the mystery man’s chest.

  He released me and I collapsed to the floor in a fit of sobs. “I’m so sorry,” I choked out, then began dry heaving uncontrollably. I was too upset, both emotionally and in my stomach.

  “Shit,” mystery man said, crouching down and attempting to rub my back. I flinched away at the pain though it shocked me out of attempting to puke my organs up. “Let me get you some water.”

  “Don’t touch her!” Zack’s voice boomed, making me jump.

  “Take it easy, man. I was just trying to help her.” mystery man’s voice was calm yet authoritative.

  Zack grabbed my wrist and pulled me to my feet. “She’s fine. She just had some bad salad.”

  “I would still take her to the hospital and make sure she and the baby are okay.”

  My whole fucking world screeched to a halt at mystery man’s words. How did he know?

  “My wife’s not fucking pregnant. What are you talking about?” Zack asked, pinning me with a death glare that said mystery man better be lying.

  Mystery man’s eyes went to my bump before coming to meet mine. I could see the confusion there and had to look away. I was already in for a hell of a punishment when I got home. “I’m not pregnant, I’ve just been cheating on my diet for the last month.”

  “See? Not pregnant.” Fury was burning hot in Zack’s eyes as he glared at me. “Let me get her in the car, then I’ll come back and handle the check,” he said to the waiter that was now trying to help move other customers away from my mess.

  A beautiful blonde appeared beside mystery man, taking hold of his elbow. “I can walk her out while you gentlemen handl
e the business end,” she offered, giving me a pitying smile.

  I hated it. I didn’t want anyone’s pity. I was getting myself out of this situation soon.

  “Thanks for the offer but I should be the one to handle my sick wife.” The way Zack said handle, had fear enveloping me.

  Tonight was gonna hurt more than most, I realized. I just hoped I’d survive it so I could get my bean and me to safety tomorrow…

  Chapter Seven

  Darik

  I handled our check and walked out to the car with Ceci holding my elbow.

  “You stink like vinegar and stomach acid,” she said once we were inside her car.

  I looked down at my damp shirt. I’d gone to the bathroom and washed off the salad bits before paying the check. “Well, I did get vomited on. I’ll shower and change as soon as we get home.”

  “I hope so because I have plans for you tonight. The clean version of you.”

  “Don’t you think it was odd how they both were acting. He was pissed but the poor girl looked terrified when I said she was pregnant.”

  Cecilia sighed. “I should have known you wouldn’t let that go. It’s none of our business, Darik, and we’ll probably never see them again so let it go.”

  I couldn’t. I’d never seen someone so scared before. And when she cried out in pain when I’d grabbed her arms, my grip hadn’t been that tight. Something didn’t feel right about the whole thing. And if she was hiding her pregnancy from her husband there had to be a good reason.

  “Would you tell me if you were pregnant?” I knew it was a dumb question.

  “I thought we weren’t--”

  “Just answer the question. Please, Cecilia. Do you feel like you would have had to hide something like that from me?”

  “No, I think you’d know before I did,” she chuckled. “You’d be the one scared to tell me.”

  I glanced at her and smiled. “You’re right. Something still doesn’t feel right to me about the whole thing, though.”

  “Let it go, Darik. No good ever came from butting into other people’s business.”